Solid Vacation School Starts Tomorrow Improving Routine
7 minute read
I got back from the beach Thursday, rested Friday, and went on an all day trip to the Mesoamerican ruins of Cacaxtla. I start back in school tomorrow. I have been in a pretty calm, relaxed state lately, and this has been great. I’ve enjoyed life more, slept better, and overall had a wonderful experience. I do need to tweak a couple of things in my routine (exercise and better meal choices), and I look forward to having a schedule again to help me with this. I have thought a lot of my goals, and instead attempting a million things, I am going to focus on 4 main goals for the short-term – having a GF has helped me take the pressure off some of the dating, sex, and emotional things that I normally feel. I am going to take advantage of this to push hard again on the goals (TLDR: I don’t want to get fat and lazy again in this relationship like I tend to do).
Next Mission: stick to the routine of my goals [below]
Actions
- Took some restful vacations… learned more about Mexican culture, and I’m almost at a point where I can fully understand 90-95% of most conversations. In fact, it’s rare that I don’t understand
- Resetting my sleep wakeup at 0630 (bedtime some time between 2200-2300)… rebought some caffeine tabs to help me with my mornings since I love waking up early to study and exercise
- My vacations were fun, but I also took them as a practice of “leadership”. I planned them out and my GF trusted and supported me in them. Again, a bit weird to word, but it felt good to plan these out and enjoy them. Previous bad experiences made me dread vacations and traveling… but oddly enough with the right person traveling is great
- Been making my own Spanish study guides from previous class material and studying them occasionally… has helped my grammar quite a bit
Goals
My results from my SIELE exam came in (Spanish proficiency standardized test). TLDR: my Spanish reading is great and my listening [comparatively] sucks
These are my goals from now until the end of my course (mid-December) – EZ and straight to the point.
- Spanish proficiency: on autopilot – I already attend class, talk mostly in Spanish, and do all my homework – BUT it is my reason for existence and being here in CDMX [for now]. I want to add daily listening practice and Duolingo since those help me with my weaknesses – set daily reminder for 15 min/morning to do these. I am also reading in Spanish, but it’s not a priority since my reading abilities are already very high.
- Routine: wakeup early and go to sleep early – having a GF in school with me makes it easy to follow this and not have to stay up late on dates or charming someone. We can just do it, study, or hangout – no game or mystery and she respects me when I say time to leave. I already have a daily alarm (even for weekends) and have been following this for the last few days – 100mg caffeine dosage in the morning will help. I’ve been missing my weekday caffeine (especially during school)
- Fitness: the altitude has made it damn near impossible for me to run or workout without getting really out of breathe or feeling like I’m having a heart attack. I will ease back into my old routine until I can workout again without dying. Daily reminder set, but still need to make easy workouts to re-establish habit and progress back
- Travel/Immersion: on autopilot – keep traveling and immersing to learn. Again having a GF, she’s going on all the trips with me. We signed up for all the tours the school puts on in the city and outside of it, so this is largely taken care of. More trips in the works with other friends as well maybe to Colombia and other places?
Routine and fitness will be my new challenges to re-establish; these are important since they “keep my wheels greased” to have a clear, functioning brain for Spanish. I fatigue very easily when I have to use my Spanish-brain and am tired from bad sleep, poor diet, or no exercise.
Girlfriend
I took my GF on all trips, and she was a wonderful travel companion. We still have a month and half before she returns to her home country, but I sort of miss her already (or rather I appreciate her a lot). She has made my trips much more fun and enjoyable… and not to get in the comparative mode too much, but I felt like I actually rested and enjoyed vacation rather than trying to cater to someone else’s [negative] emotions. For someone young, she is more than great. <– To give her the best credit, she is helping my entitlement of what I look for in a lover (and not just what I tolerate to have a lover). NRE and honeymoon phase sure but it is continuing to be great
I asked questions relating to a 3some and her interest in women. She told me [in Spanish] that her liking other women is “very incorrect in her church” XD Again, the irony of homosexuality being bad but pre-marital sex is not (or we don’t talk about it) is hilarious. Long-term, she wants to be the religious trad-wife, and I don’t care to live a traditional life again. This is the only major incompatibility we have had aside from language barrier and her returning to her country. I respect that she has beliefs that are important to her even if I don’t understand them (and I was raised Southern Baptist during my childhood).
Random Thoughts
Outsider
I am more comfortable with being an outsider, but it does still bother me. Again, it’s one of those things where I’ll always be an outsider here or anywhere else in LatAm. I don’t care to live separated from the locals, so I will continue with my exposure. I’ve had some interesting musings on being viewed as a bank account or resource by vendors and panhandlers. I’m not unique in this, and I suppose women feel this a lot, though for reasons of attractiveness and not presumptive wealth like for me. I’ve been called a “huero” a couple of times by some street vagrants, and I feel dumb to be mad about it but I am. Makes me feel a bit vulnerable and out of place here sometimes, but I have had no problems yet. I’ve felt more unsafe in my old city than here [so far].
Relationships
Maybe a bit odd to plan the end of my current relationship, but I know it will end. I realized that I don’t enjoy 1-night stands (as I’ve already said somewhere here) and prefer a stable connection. I do miss new dates/girls, but less than I would think – I don’t care to give those time until after this relationship ends since they are not helpful to my current goals. In an ideal situation, I would love to have a stable, independent, and loving travel girlfriend while being able to see other women too. I told two of my other chicks that I was in a non-exclusive relationship (again, being open, honest, and direct here), and:
- The first responded back snarky and passive. She was likely hurt/surprised and responded poorly – she ultimately told me she didn’t want to talk/see me anymore, so I appreciate her honesty (although I had to get it out of her). I didn’t feel much of a connection to her, so this was a good result for us both
- The second (who always texted me hearts and messages about love and kisses) ignored me and unfollowed me off IG. I was a bit more upset/irritated that she couldn’t just say something. I assume she was hurt too, but this was a good experience for me to see how she handled adversity. She had been “too busy” to see me the last couple of weeks, so I think we both naturally had lost interest. She is a very sweet person, but she has a drinking and [weed] smoking problem, so I appreciate not having the bad influence anymore in my life.